being frank

In today’s world where there are so many things happening that affect the nature of who, what and why we are, it’s often difficult to determine what to write about. It’s a tough decision because I don’t like to come across as a reactive writer. It might make me appear to be someone who is trending when it comes to the latest chatter. But for me, it would only make me a part of that noise.

I don’t want to be noise. I want to be a note that might help someone find the right tune that needs to play in their mind and in their heart. And the note that I believe is missing these days has to do with what we want.

But the want in the context of this article isn’t based on a word but rather an acronym:

We Are Not Thinking.

Reacting? Oh yeah; we’re doing that in grand fashion. But thinking seems to have lost its footing. There are those who say that we’ve been thinking too much; that this is a time for action. And to a certain extent, I would agree. We have spent an inordinate amount of time thinking about things. Things that bother us; things that upset us; things that anger us; things that scare us.

But the obvious news bulletin here is that there will always be things that bother, upset, anger and scare us. It’s called Human Nature. It’s wired through our genetics, culture, and our social and familial upbringings so it may react to life’s experiences in different ways and different levels of intensity and concern. Yet some people don’t seem to be connected to their humanity in the manner that they should. We need this in order to think with clarity; we need this to find that singular voice in our mind we used to call our conscience.

And to be clear, I’m not trying to create a delineation of sorts between any given ideology, religion, social convention, biological inference, etc.; nothing of the sort. I’m just sharing a simple observation: We are not thinking.

Why? Because if you think about it, we all can see what is happening all around us. I’ve had so many conversations with family, friends and even complete strangers, and in almost every instance, people have voiced the same concern – something just ain’t right. Yet the one fundamental component that came up missing in almost every conversation was that in most cases, people were mixing thinking with reacting. And that’s the dangerous cocktail that has landed us where we’re at today.

 

A Penny for Your Thoughts

Oh, I would that I could, but we no longer have the pennies to spend on such trivial activities.

But we should.

Because what is happening in the world today is coming about from a lack of conscientious thinking. And no, there are no easy ways to approach this dilemma. Those enumerated lists you’ll find on social media will deliver awesome ways in which to succeed at a given craft, make money, find success, find love, find productive solutions, or just find yourself – period. But those lists are not going to offer quick and effortless ways for us to think ourselves out of the predicament we find ourselves in. And it’s not because it’s impossible. It’s because we’re stuck focusing primarily on the monetary value of our happiness and success. So whenever we hear the groupthink espoused by influencers, politicians, business analysts, etc. concerning where our financial footing should stand from a personal or national perspective, our thoughts are influenced to think along those lines. Our attitude becomes one of profit over humaneness. If there’s no money to be made from it, it holds little value. And if there’s no value in it, then there’s no need to think about it. Let others figure out what’s best for everyone else; I need to do me (even though that’s not the real me.)

System Justification Theory was developed to further explore why some people legitimize prevailing social systems even when they may go against their own self-interests or ethical beliefs. When money becomes the guiding force for everything we cherish, our thoughts will rationalize those bastions of perceived success and do what it can to emulate them. And if the methods by which that success was achieved doesn’t quite align with humanitarianism, the reactive mind will clear that right up (again: no money, no value; no value, no worries.) When you see a gilded palace, you probably won’t bemoan the excess. You might admire the power and prestige it represents; that opportunities come to those who work hard.

With all this opinionated dissonance endlessly floating about in a 24/7 infotainment cycle, it certainly makes sense to take the path of least resistance while also rewarding yourself the most by putting in the least amount of thought. But that’s just the thing: thinking about what’s happening at this very moment requires work. It requires diligence and it requires courage. It insists you face the truth that exists in today’s world, each slathered in a fantastical and opinionated goo. This ‘social slop’ attaches itself to the facts behind every action, idea and event announced on these endless networks and social streams. And this is a critical component to their success, because that slop aims to deflect the realities inherent to each of those facts by hooking them up to a set of improbabilities or conjectures wrapped in a catchy phrase:

“Yeah, that’s the ticket!”

 

A Tale As Old As Time

“When we are not engaged in thinking about some definite problem, we usually spend about 95 percent of our time thinking about ourselves.”

– Dale Carnegie (How to Win Friends and Influence People)

The only reason I placed Carnegie’s quote here is because he originally wrote that in 1936. And that statistic hasn’t gotten any better in the past ninety years.

According to a recent study conducted by Harvard psychologists Matthew A. Killingsworth and Daniel T. Gilbert, we spend 46.9% of our time thinking about what isn’t happening around us. Their study brought up some interesting points:

• Unlike other animals, humans spend a lot of time thinking about what isn’t going on around them: contemplating events that happened in the past, might happen in the future, or may never happen at all. Indeed, mind-wandering appears to be the human brain’s default mode of operation.
• People were found to be happiest when making love, exercising, or engaging in conversation. They were least happy when resting, working, or using a home computer.
• Time-lag analyses suggested that their subjects’ mind-wandering was generally the cause, not the consequence, of their unhappiness.

Killingsworth and Gilbert went on to say that,

“Many philosophical and religious traditions teach that happiness is to be found by living in the moment, and practitioners are trained to resist mind wandering and to ‘be here now.’ These traditions suggest that a wandering mind is an unhappy mind.”

Yet there is an inherent danger to casting a blanket misrepresentation on the concept of a wandering mind. Such an exercise can provide cognitive advantages and help boost your productivity. It all depends on what you choose to allow your mind to wonder on about, and the consequences they may have on your emotional health. Think of it this way: You cannot expect your mind to imagine a positive thought about winter while your car is stuck in the snow.

 

Final Thoughts

Take a look at the world today. Laws and institutions that have held the test of time are now falling apart. Not because we’ve found flaws or mistakes, but because we’ve allowed the social slop of opinionated presumptions wrapped around them to muddle their facts and stifle our thoughts and concerns. We’ve elevated influencers to become inflated commercial enterprises that now sway markets, impact businesses, and have the ability to capture the attention of some of the world’s most powerful people. Not because they bring wisdom or insights to the table or even ideas based on common sense. They present “hits” and “clicks” used to represent millions of people. That mixture of numbers with its implied mainstream appeal falsely echoes an idea or opinion, when in reality it represents a vast majority of folks who went with the flow because it was easier to relinquish their right to think to a complete stranger in return for a false sense of belonging.

Politicians, heads of corporations and the various social, financial and business sectors that have a stake in expanding their wealth and influence have taken up this manner of disrupting your thought process. By using demonstrations of wealth, influence, power, righteous indignation and bombshell revelations, your thoughts are guided to where they need to be in order to maintain a status quo.

We all see the disparity in grocery prices, gas, and income inequality. We watch as the continual eradication of our educational system gives our children less which in the end, will cost society more. We watch as our friends, relatives and neighbors fight against a system that has no immediate plans to improve their lives or protect their well-being, yet we carelessly support the very powers that built and maintain the social channels that will eventually affect us all.

We see these issues every day. We understand the basics of the system of government that exists; what each branch is supposed to be doing to provide balance, equity, and justice. We keep reading phrases from our history like “we, the people”, “with liberty and justice for all”, “deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed”, “we hold these truths to be self-evident…” We know them to be flawed and even conflicting in nature, but they nonetheless made it into our most cherished documents. Not to be followed blindly but to be thought about honestly and improved upon wisely; not to be taken at face value, but to be made inclusive by using the lessons learned from history.

We know what is right and what is wrong, and we know the rights we were granted in order to right a wrong. The only wrong we need to contend with now is the manner in which we’re thinking. Because if we cannot align our thoughts with the realities that are staring us in the face, then I shudder to imagine the unthinkable realities that await us in our near future.