CeCe and I loved coming up with fun and inventive ways to celebrate Valentine’s Day. Many of our friends have enjoyed crafting these kinds of impish plans for years to add a playful yet loving touch to their embodiment of the day. For CeCe and I, the only condition we would impose on one other was that we couldn’t rely on the typical offerings of treats, cards or flowers to express our feelings. But it wasn’t because they posed a challenge; we just saw that as being somewhat redundant because we used those throughout the year to profess our love. They would range from a simple touch when passing each other around the house, to adding a simple (or silly) expression of love in the form of a love-themed garnish on a sandwich, or a note placed on a monitor, laptop or mirror. Although these were always cherished, they were never the focus of the intent. That was embedded in the act itself; acknowledging that in the midst of a busy or harried schedule, we each took a moment to think of the other, with love.
As fun and expressive as Valentine’s Day can be, you don’t need one day out of the year to celebrate or acknowledge the love in your life. You have 365 of those at your disposal to imperceptibly express your love in ways only you and your partner would understand. Love doesn’t need an object; all it needs is an objective. Something, anything to demonstrate that your love is clear, profound, and uniquely special. That’s what true love is meant to do by default.
The accoutrements you purchase for Valentine’s Day? Well, those are more a way to express your love for the act of consumerism. According to statistics1, a person in their first year of a loving relationship will spend an average of $9,200 on love-related activities and gifts. The statistics go on to show that the average person spends over $192,000 on love in a lifetime; with average person meaning someone who isn’t a celebrity or owns a yacht, and a lifetime presumably lasting about 40-odd years. And what helps to drive these sales is the subliminal messaging that is everywhere. According to another statistic2, more than 100 million songs have been written throughout history that pertain to love. And in today’s modern society, it’s estimated that between 57% to 67% of all songs written are based on the theme of love.
Yet despite all the statistics and the plethora of information generated about, for, and in honor of love, many people not only consider it difficult to find, but vehemently believe that a soulmate is an impossibility. Having experienced both sides of that coin, I’d like to give you my $0.02’s worth that you may (if you wish) mull over as you make your plans for Valentines.
The mysteries of love are neither exclusive to the domain of youth, nor is the beauty of passionate love solely found in their playground. The essence of true love; that deep and lasting affection that not even death can abolish, resides within a heart that understands the importance of limitations. Limitations of the body; of dreams or fantasies, and even life itself. It’s a heart whose love doesn’t dwell solely on what the flesh can offer, but rather what the mind can conjure. A heart whose love doesn’t diminish along with physical strength or beauty. Bodily attributes will change despite all attempts to the contrary. Yet love’s resolute devotion sees beyond that to celebrate the companionship, passion, laughter, and joy that continue well beyond the ravages of time or illness. This is the heart of a soulmate; one who knows that love is what bears the fruit of life’s endless treasures; not the other way around. For life exists within a framework of mortality. But for a soulmate, love exists as a form of pure energy, and energy never dies.
So as you’re getting primed for a wonderful Valentine’s Day with your significant other, don’t dwell on the objects of your affection; focus on the objectives of your heart. And for those of you who worry about ever finding true love: Stop. There’s no point in getting all wrapped up in actively trying to find the love of your life. That person is out there, but they’ll only appear when you stop looking. One of the more common things about looking for true love that many people experience is just how uncommonly difficult it was to find. That’s because love is never about the search; it’s about its willingness to reveal itself to you. In the end, love is never sweeter than when it enters your life in total silence.
Leave a Reply